The ISIHAC
Builders' Jargon Page

Last Updated
25 Jul 2008

On the BBC Radio 4 show I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue, one of the rounds includes suggestions for examples of Builders' jargon, along with a translation. Here are some of the teams' suggestions, along with some of my suggestions. If you have any ideas you would like included, please e-mail me here, and I will add the best ones (with full credit to you of course)

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This needs pointing = It needs pointing the other way.
06 Jul 1985
We can start Monday = You can pick any Monday & you'd be wrong.
06 Jul 1985
Make good = Disguise cock-up.
06 Jul 1985
A builder was asked for a quotation on the roof, so he shouted 'A thing of beauty is a joy for a fortnight', and jumped off!
06 Jul 1985
Quotation = One eighth of the final price.
06 Jul 1985
Let's look at the drains = Pull the house down and we can get a really good look at them.
06 Jul 1985
You'll notice there are a few differences from the drawings = We had the plans upside-down.
06 Jul 1985
We're using well seasoned timber = We're putting in your new beam just as soon as the leaves have dropped off.
06 Jul 1985
You don't happen to know if there's an RSJ there? = Don't blame me of the house falls down.
06 Jul 1985
Don't you worry - you won't know we're there = We won't be there.
06 Jul 1985
This needs pointing = It needs pointing the other way. ISIHAC 1, Side 4
We can start Monday = You can pick any Monday & you'd be wrong. ISIHAC 1, Side 4
Make good = Disguise cock-up. ISIHAC 1, Side 4
A builder was asked for a quotation on the roof, so he shouted 'A thing of beauty is a joy for a fortnight', and jumped off! ISIHAC 1, Side 4
Quotation = One eighth of the final price. ISIHAC 1, Side 4
You'll notice there are a few differences from the drawings = We had the plans upside-down. ISIHAC 1, Side 4
We're using well seasoned timber = We're putting in your new beam just as soon as the leaves have dropped off. ISIHAC 1, Side 4
You don't happen to know if there's an RSJ there? = Don't blame me of the house falls down. ISIHAC 1, Side 4
Don't you worry - you won't know we're there = We won't be there. ISIHAC 1, Side 4
Oh, we do electrics = No, we don't. Brighton
27 May 1995
Pebbledash = Throw a stone through the window & run off. Brighton
27 May 1995
Don't use the phone for the moment, we're working on that wall = We've knackered the cable. Brighton
27 May 1995
I'll be round first thing in the morning = I'll be round tomorrow afternoon, just when you've decided not to stay in any longer. Brighton
27 May 1995
Oh, we do plumbing = No, we don't. Brighton
27 May 1995
That door won't stick when the wood's dried out = That door won't open when the wood's dried out. Brighton
27 May 1995
You know what they say about dust - it's lucky! Brighton
27 May 1995
Oh, we do tiling = No, we don't. Brighton
27 May 1995
No, no, that is level - you're leaning. Brighton
27 May 1995
You won't know we're here = We won't be here. Brighton
27 May 1995
It will require some drying out time before we continue = We are trying to sober up the brick layer. Steve Aaron
Buying off plan = We plan to be off as soon as you have bought the property. Steve Aaron
Oh, we do electrics = No, we don't. ISIHAC Classic Repeat
27 Apr 2008
Pebbledash = Throw a stone through the window & run off. ISIHAC Classic Repeat
27 Apr 2008
Don't use the phone for the moment, we're working on that wall = We've knackered the cable. ISIHAC Classic Repeat
27 Apr 2008
I'll be round first thing in the morning = I'll be round tomorrow afternoon, just when you've decided not to stay in any longer. ISIHAC Classic Repeat
27 Apr 2008
Oh, we do plumbing = No, we don't. ISIHAC Classic Repeat
27 Apr 2008
That door won't stick when the wood's dried out = That door won't open when the wood's dried out. ISIHAC Classic Repeat
27 Apr 2008
You know what they say about dust - it's lucky! ISIHAC Classic Repeat
27 Apr 2008
Oh, we do tiling = No, we don't. ISIHAC Classic Repeat
27 Apr 2008
No, no, that is level - you're leaning. ISIHAC Classic Repeat
27 Apr 2008
You won't know we're here = We won't be here. ISIHAC Classic Repeat
27 Apr 2008
(d?) after venue signifies a query regarding the Date of broadcast,
(??) signifies a query regarding Venue of broadcast


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