The ISIHAC
Complete Greetings Cards Page

Last Updated
16 Jan 2008

On the BBC Radio 4 show I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue, one of the rounds includes suggestions for replacement endings to genuine Greetings Cards messages. Here are some of the teams' suggestions, along with some of my suggestions. If you have any ideas you would like included, please e-mail me here, and I will add the best ones (with full credit to you of course)
Just move your mouse over the words ANSWER or REAL ANSWER to reveal all!

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Exam Results Greetings Card:
We've known you've worked so very hard, determined to get through it
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Dartford
07 Jun 2004
Well Done in your Job Interview Card:
Magnificent! Marvellous! Wonderful! Brill! Talented! Gifted! Consumate skill!
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Dartford
07 Jun 2004
Wedding Anniversary Card:
Just like a lighthouse on the rocks, withstanding stormy weather.
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Dartford
07 Jun 2004
16th Birthday Card:
Sixteen years have come and gone, and now your birthday's here,
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Dartford
07 Jun 2004
Sympathy Card:
Sometimes words are inadequate, our feelings to express
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Dartford
07 Jun 2004
St. Patrick's Day Card:
We're searching for that clover, the one that brings you luck
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Dartford
07 Jun 2004
90th Birthday Card:
Happy birthday to you and heartfelt congratulations, We really hope you'll have a joyful celebration
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Dartford
07 Jun 2004
21st Birthday Card:
Can't find the words to tell you, Don't quite know what to say
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Dartford
07 Jun 2004
Exam Results Greetings Card:
We've known you've worked so very hard, determined to get through it
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
2004 Xmas Special Compilation
27 Dec 2004
Well Done in your Job Interview Card:
Magnificent! Marvellous! Wonderful! Brill! Talented! Gifted! Consumate skill!
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
2004 Xmas Special Compilation
27 Dec 2004
Wedding Anniversary Card:
Just like a lighthouse on the rocks, withstanding stormy weather.
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
2004 Xmas Special Compilation
27 Dec 2004
16th Birthday Card:
Sixteen years have come and gone, and now your birthday's here,
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
2004 Xmas Special Compilation
27 Dec 2004
Sympathy Card:
Sometimes words are inadequate, our feelings to express
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
2004 Xmas Special Compilation
27 Dec 2004
21st Birthday Card:
Can't find the words to tell you, Don't quite know what to say
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
2004 Xmas Special Compilation
27 Dec 2004
[ Wedding Card:
The beginning of a partnership to last your whole life through,
Living happily ever after, as all your dreams come true,
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Not broadcast]
Brighton
05 Dec 2005
Happy Autumn Card:
Trade in your teeny bikini, Roll down the cuffs on your sleeves,
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Brighton
05 Dec 2005
Apology Card:
I'm sorry it's just two little words but they're words I have to say. For the pain that I have caused you in my terrible, thoughtless way.
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Brighton
05 Dec 2005
[ Halloween Card:
'Tiz that eery time of year, With scary things all around,
The kids will don a costume, and make their way through town,
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Not broadcast]
Brighton
05 Dec 2005
Card to a Grandmother:
She's gentle and sweet, and very petite. She's bold and strong and will help you along.
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Brighton
05 Dec 2005
[ Passing your Driving Test Card:
Honk! Honk! Who's this new driver? Passing through the gates.
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Not broadcast]
Brighton
05 Dec 2005
[ Good Luck in your new job Card:
We knew it had to happen, and now you're off to pastures new,
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Not broadcast]
Brighton
05 Dec 2005
Get Well Card:
Who feels good to be alive? Who wants to laugh and sing? Who wants to leap like salmon, or jump like lambs in spring?
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Brighton
05 Dec 2005
New Arrival Card:
Ten little fingers, two little eyes. One little nose, button size.
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Brighton
05 Dec 2005
Pregnancy Card:
Deep within your body a tiny life is growing.
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Brighton
05 Dec 2005
Card to a Grandfather:
Grandfather, you can always bank on my love. It's both totally credit and interest free.
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Brighton
05 Dec 2005
Card on becoming Grandparents: An extension of your family, grandparents you've become.
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Brighton
05 Dec 2005
Card on Passing A Test:
Your news is just terrific. So glad you passed your test.
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Not broadcast]
Croydon
12 Nov 2007
Card for a New Baby:
Ten tiny little fingers that always want to play. That never stop exploring the wonder of today. Ten tiny little fingers that from the very start
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Croydon
12 Nov 2007
Father's Day Card:
A Dad gives hope when life is low. A Dad's a place where you can go. A Dad is honest, a Dad is true.
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Croydon
12 Nov 2007
Mother's Day Card:
You were always there as I grew up, You're as lovely as they come. In the lottery of life I got
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Croydon
12 Nov 2007
Card for a Baby Boy:
Your lovely bouncing baby boy will bring you so much pleasure,
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Croydon
12 Nov 2007
Congratulations, it's Twins:
There's two to wash, and two to dry. There's two who argue and two who cry. There's two to kiss and two to hug.
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Croydon
12 Nov 2007
Get Well Soon Card:
If knowing that someone really cares helps healing along its way,
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Croydon
12 Nov 2007
Valentine's Day Card:
Our love is like a tree that grows, still stronger through the years. Nourished by our laughter, and sometimes by our tears. It shelters and protects us from the dark and sunny sky, And like a tree
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Not broadcast]
Croydon
12 Nov 2007
Card from a Dog needing to be put to sleep:
You will be sad, I understand. But don't let grief then stay your hand. Today's the day, more than the rest. Your love for me must stand the test. Take me to where my needs they'll tend. Only, stay with me till the end, and hold me firm and speak to me, until my eyes no longer see. I know in time you will agree,
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Croydon
12 Nov 2007
Father's Day Card:
I cannot thank you half as much as I think I oughta
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Not broadcast]
Croydon
12 Nov 2007
Get Well Soon Card:
This card is sent to cheer you, 'Cos you're confined to bed.
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Not broadcast]
Croydon
12 Nov 2007
Anniversary Card:
Well done on reaching silver! A toast, let's raise our glasses!
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Croydon
12 Nov 2007
Congratulations On Your Divorce Card:
You were once so very happy, the day you made that vow, But I have noted one thing - you seem much happier now
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Croydon
12 Nov 2007
Easter Card:
Guess who's hop-hop-hopping your way, To wish you a hap-hap-happy holiday. Loaded with goodies made just for you.
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Croydon
12 Nov 2007
In Deepest Sympathy Card:
Through the pain and loss you feel, you can count on our support.
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Not broadcast]
Croydon
12 Nov 2007
Engagement Card:
You are a perfect couple. You're such a heavenly pair.
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
Croydon
12 Nov 2007
Exam Results Greetings Card:
We've known you've worked so very hard, determined to get through it
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
ISIHAC 9, Side 3
Well Done in your Job Interview Card:
Magnificent! Marvellous! Wonderful! Brill! Talented! Gifted! Consumate skill!
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
ISIHAC 9, Side 3
Happy Birthday Daughter Card:
Because you are a daughter, who's lovable and dear,
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
ISIHAC 9, Side 3
Wedding Anniversary Card:
Just like a lighthouse on the rocks, withstanding stormy weather.
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
ISIHAC 9, Side 3
Sympathy Card:
Sometimes words are inadequate, our feelings to express
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
ISIHAC 9, Side 3
Get Well Card:
A little birdy tells me that you've not been very well.
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
ISIHAC 9, Side 3
16th Birthday Card:
Sixteen years have come and gone, and now your birthday's here,
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
ISIHAC 9, Side 3
Get Well Card:
Thinking thoughts of you today, because you're feeling blue
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
ISIHAC 9, Side 3
Valentine's Day Card:
It's that special time again when Cupid shoots his bow
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
ISIHAC 9, Side 3
St. Patrick's Day Card:
We're searching for that clover, the one that brings you luck
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
ISIHAC 9, Side 3
90th Birthday Card:
Happy birthday to you and heartfelt congratulations, We really hope you'll have a joyful celebration
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
ISIHAC 9, Side 3
21st Birthday Card:
Can't find the words to tell you, Don't quite know what to say
ANSWER
REAL ANSWER
ISIHAC 9, Side 3
(d?) after venue signifies a query regarding the Date of broadcast,
(??) signifies a query regarding Venue of broadcast


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