| Virginibus pleurisque: Raindrops keep falling on Richard Branson's charabanc | 11 Mar 1989 |
| Et in arcadia ego: I had an omelette down the shopping precinct | 11 Mar 1989 |
| Nouveau Beaujolais: Unsuitable for drinking | 11 Mar 1989 |
| Dos vidanya: I'm sleeping rough with Anya | 11 Mar 1989 |
| Porca verba: Pig Latin | 11 Mar 1989 |
| Aqua minerali: Waiter, I'm driving | 11 Mar 1989 |
| Sole bonne femme: I met this great lady at the Olympics | 11 Mar 1989 |
| Mama mia!: Rosemary's baby | 11 Mar 1989 |
| La vie en rose: I've got a pink khasi | 11 Mar 1989 |
| Canard a l'orange: Iain Paisley's lying | 11 Mar 1989 |
| Vin ordinaire: Ford Transit | 11 Mar 1989 |
| La belle dame sans merci: The telephone operator never says 'thank you' | 11 Mar 1989 |
| A capella: The band hasn't turned up | Chichester
12 Dec 1992 |
| Ad hoc: Liven up your rice pudding with a little German wine | Chichester
12 Dec 1992 |
| A la carte: Rhyming slang | Brighton
13 Jun 1992 |
| Ad nauseam: The feeling you get from watching too much ITV | 20 Sep 1986 |
| Ad nauseam: The latest Benetton campaign | |
| Aloha: An asthmatic policeman's greeting | 25 May 1985 |
| Annus horibilis: Do you mind if I don't sit down? | Bath
14 Jun 1997 |
| Annus horibilis: Do you mind if I don't sit down? | ISIHAC 5, Side 3 |
| Anti pasta: Aunt's past it | 20 Sep 1986 |
| Apparatchik: A cross between a parrot & a chick | Richmond-Upon- Thames
15 Jun 1996 |
| Après moi le déluge: You can have the lavatory after me | 20 Sep 1986 |
| Après nous le déluge: The lavatory's blocked | ISIHAC 1, Side 3 |
| Après ski: Plaster of Paris or I've finished the yoghurt | Brighton
13 Jun 1992 |
| Après ski: Plaster of Paris or I've finished the yoghurt | ISIHAC 1, Side 3 |
| Au clair de la lune: Clair's a bit of a nutter | 20 Sep 1986 |
| Avant-garde: The next-to-last coach on the train | Brighton
13 Jun 1992 |
| Avant-garde: The next-to-last coach on the train | ISIHAC 1, Side 3 |
| Avez-vous faimes?: Would you like my sister? | 14 Apr 1984 |
| Bauhaus: Dog kennel | Bauhaus
12 Dec 1992 |
| Belle époque: A cheap cut of pig meat | Richmond-Upon- Thames
15 Jun 1996 |
| Bidet: Two days before D-Day | Brighton
13 Jun 1992 |
| Bidet: Two days before D-Day | ISIHAC 1, Side 3 |
| Bona fide: Good Dog | ISIHAC 1, Side 3 |
| Bonsai: Dyslexic kamikaze pilot | Edinburgh
13 Nov 1993 |
| Boutique: Shoe shop | Kevin Hale |
| Bratwürst: Macaulay Caulkin | Chichester
12 Dec 1992 |
| Bureau de change: Superman's telephone box | Brighton
13 Jun 1992 |
| Carpe diem: Fish of the Day | Brighton
13 Jun 1992 |
| Carpe diem: Fish of the Day | ISIHAC 1, Side 3 |
| Chacun a son goût: Jack's got the gout | 14 Apr 1984 |
| Chacun a son goût: Oh, you like Pot Noodle, do you? | 20 Sep 1986 |
| Charabancs: The cleaning lady's a goer | Chichester
12 Dec 1992 |
| Charabancs: Coach accident | Kevin Hale |
| Ciabatta: The Wookie in Star Wars | |
| Cinquecento: 100-year-old Chinaman | |
| Coup de grâce: To finish mowing the lawn | Kevin Hale |
| Corps de ballet: The sound an audience makes when one of the male dancers leaps on with what looks like the dome of St.Pauls in his tights | 25 May 1985 |
| Crêche: A car accident in Woking | ISIHAC 1, Side 3 |
| Cul de sac: My bag is in the refigerator | 20 Sep 1986 |
| Culpa levis: To be excused for wearing jeans | Kevin Hale |
| Daiwoo: Host of Supermarket Sweep | |
| Deutschland, Deutschland Uber Alles: Alice has had it away all over Holland | 14 Apr 1984 |
| Dieu et mon droit: The family motto of Mrs. Thatcher's family: God And Me Are Right | 14 Apr 1984 |
| Donna è mobile: Portable kebab stand | Chichester
12 Dec 1992 |
| Donner & blitzen: Kebab & the runs | Edinburgh
13 Nov 1993 |
| Dossier: A person who sleeps under the bridges of Paris | Chichester
12 Dec 1992 |
| Droit de seneur: Sir dresses on the right, I believe | 20 Sep 1986 |
| Droit de seneur: The Gents is on the right | ISIHAC 1, Side 3 |
| Eldorado: Didn't seem like a good idea in the beginning | Edinburgh
13 Nov 1993 |
| Ersatz: A Somerset milliner | Bath
14 Jun 1997 |
| Ersatz: A Somerset milliner | ISIHAC 5, Side 3 |
| Et tu, Brute?: Did you eat the after shave? | 14 Apr 1984 |
| Et tu, Brute?: Blimey! You've splashed it all over, and no mistake! | Richmond-Upon- Thames
15 Jun 1996 |
| Eureka!: B.O.! | Brighton
13 Jun 1992 |
| Fete vaux jeux (?): Go three rounds with the green goddess or Go blind slowly | 19 May 1984 |
| Fin de siecle: Bicycle lover | Bath
14 Jun 1997 |
| Fin de siecle: Bicycle lover | ISIHAC 5, Side 3 |
| Film noir: You forgot to take the cap off the camera again | Edinburgh
13 Nov 1993 |
| Film noir: My camera's bust! | Richmond-Upon- Thames
15 Jun 1996 |
| Film noir: Oh Damn! The holiday photo's haven't come out! | Bath
14 Jun 1997 |
| Film noir: Oh Damn! The holiday photo's haven't come out! | ISIHAC 5, Side 3 |
| Graffiti: Newton's Law of Dyslexia | Chichester
12 Dec 1992 |
| Grand prix: Michael Howard | Bath
14 Jun 1997 |
| Grand prix: Michael Howard | ISIHAC 5, Side 3 |
| Hande hoch!: The white wine is at your elbow! | 25 May 1985 |
| Hara-kiri: Opera singer educated at public school | Bath
14 Jun 1997 |
| Hara-kiri: Opera singer educated at public school | ISIHAC 5, Side 3 |
| Honi soit qui mal y pense: Kneel down those who think Mal is a ponce | Kevin Hale |
| Hors de saison: A young lady of sixteen | 25 May 1985 |
| Ich bin ein Berliner: I am a misprint for a binliner | 14 Apr 1984 |
| Ich dien: I am Jayne Torville's dancing partner | 20 Sep 1986 |
| Ich liebe dich: I'm very fond of Richard | 14 Apr 1984 |
| Infra dig: I'm an archaeologist | Buxton
21 Nov 1992 |
| In loco parentis: Making love on a train | Kevin Hale |
| Jihad: - is what fundamentalist cowboys yell! | Edinburgh
13 Nov 1993 |
| La cucaracha: Chef's special | 20 Sep 1986 |
| La dame aux camelia: Lady Camelhair Porker-Bowels | Edinburgh
13 Nov 1993 |
| L'après midi d'une faune: You've been on the telephone since lunch! | 20 Sep 1986 |
| L'après midi d'une faune: Cheap rate | 19 May 1984 |
| Magnum opus: A big Irish cat | ISIHAC 1, Side 3 |
| Magnum opus: The Irish cat private eye | Richmond-Upon- Thames
15 Jun 1996 |
| Ma petite chose: My flies are open | 19 May 1984 |
| Masseuse: A room full of stutterers | Buxton
21 Nov 1992 |
| Mi casa tu casa: My house has two lavatories | 25 May 1985 |
| Modus operandi: Miss Mowlem ruins a performance of La Traviata | Kevin Hale |
| Moi aussi: I am an Australian | 14 Apr 1984 |
| Non compos mentis: I don't think that's meant to be fertilizer | Brighton
13 Jun 1992 |
| Non compos mentis: I don't think that's meant to be fertilizer | ISIHAC 1, Side 3 |
| Nota bene: The new Crossroads TV series is missing an important character | Kevin Hale |
| O sole mio: That's my fish | 20 Sep 1986 |
| Pas de deux: Father of twins | Kevin Hale |
| Paterfamilias: A well-known comedy routine | |
| Petite chose: Your flies are open | Edinburgh
13 Nov 1993 |
| Prima donna: Sean Penn's bachelor days | 20 Sep 1986 |
| Pro forma: Ex Prostitute | Kevin Hale |
| Quelque chose: Your flies are undone | Kevin Hale |
| Quid pro quo: These rock band tickets are cheap | Kevin Hale |
| Sic transit Gloria mundi: Gloria was sick in the van, but she'll be in on Monday | Richmond-Upon- Thames
15 Jun 1996 |
| Semper fidelis: That violin sounds awful | Kevin Hale |
| Snickers: Spanties | Edinburgh
13 Nov 1993 |
| Soupçon: Dinner's nearly ready | Bath
14 Jun 1997 |
| Soupçon: Dinner's nearly ready | ISIHAC 5, Side 3 |
| Spaghetti carbonara: My dinner's on fire | 25 May 1985 |
| Steak tartare: The meat's off! | 20 Sep 1986 |
| Sub judice: The Isreali Underground system | Brighton
13 Jun 1992 |
| Sub judice: The Isreali Underground system | ISIHAC 1, Side 3 |
| Sushi: Eddy Canter's best known song after the drink got him - If You Knew Sushi Like I Know Sushi | Richmond-Upon- Thames
15 Jun 1996 |
| Tant pis, tant mieux: Aunty's been to the bathroom and she's feeling much better now | 25 May 1985 |
| Tour de force: Visit to a police station | Kevin Hale |
| Trompe d'oeuil: That one made my eyes water! | Bath
14 Jun 1997 |
| Trompe d'oeuil: That one made my eyes water! | ISIHAC 5, Side 3 |
| Tutti frutti: Baked beans | Buxton
21 Nov 1992 |
| Valpolicella: Mr. Doonican's parrot is in the string section | 14 Apr 1984 |
| Veni, vidi, vici: I came to see Vicky; unfortunately she was suffering from a social disease | 19 May 1984 |
| Veni, vidi, vici...: ...Mick and Tich | 14 Apr 1984 |
| Virgo intacta: An unsullied snooker commentator | Kevin Hale |
| Hors d'Ouevres: Women who hang around diesel pumps | Brighton
13 Jun 1992 |
| Bona fide: Good Dog | Buxton
21 Nov 1992 |
| Droit de seneur: The Gents is on the right | Buxton
21 Nov 1992 |
| Crêche: A car accident in Woking | Buxton
21 Nov 1992 |
| Fin de siecle: Cycling enthusiast | Buxton
21 Nov 1992 |
| Magnum opus: A big Irish cat | Buxton
21 Nov 1992 |
| Enfant terrible: Jeremy Beadle | Buxton
21 Nov 1992 |
| Carte blanche: A Streetcar Named Desire | Buxton
21 Nov 1992 |
| Après nous le déluge: The lavatory's blocked | Buxton
21 Nov 1992 |
| In loco parentis: Engine driver | Buxton
21 Nov 1992 |
| Fiat lux: Car wash | Chichester
12 Dec 1992 |
| Bankette: A little bank | Chichester
12 Dec 1992 |
| Duvet: Well, I didn't know vat about vem | Chichester
12 Dec 1992 |
| Fiat lux: Car wash | 19 Oct 1987 |
| Cannelloni al forno: Al's fallen in the canal | 19 Oct 1987 |
| Magnum opus: Tom Selleck's Irish cat | 19 Oct 1987 |
| Requiescat in pacum: Our cat was totally ruined in the park | 19 Oct 1987 |
| Toujours la politesse: If I'm not out in two days, send for a policewoman | 19 Oct 1987 |
| C'est la guerre: Jumble sale | 19 Oct 1987 |
| Sang froid: A cold song, as in I'm Dreaming Of A White Christmas | 19 Oct 1987 |
| Have a nice day!: ...now bugger off! | 19 Oct 1987 |
| Droit de seneur: Ah, Sir dresses to the right | Paris Theatre
07 Sep 1987 |
| Pardonez Moi: I'm sorry about Frank Muir | Paris Theatre
07 Sep 1987 |
| Donner Und Blitzen!: The after effects of a kebab | Paris Theatre
07 Sep 1987 |
| Donna è mobile: Kebab on wheels | Paris Theatre
07 Sep 1987 |
| Ich dien: I am Jayne Torville's dancing partner | Paris Theatre
07 Sep 1987 |
| Dernier Pensée: The last pimp before the M1 | Paris Theatre
07 Sep 1987 |
| Achtung!: German kissing | Paris Theatre
07 Sep 1987 |
| Con allegro: Second hand car salesman | Paris Theatre
07 Sep 1987 |
| Mens Sana In Corpore Sano: Corporal punishment available in the men's sauna | Paris Theatre
07 Sep 1987 |
| C'est la guerre: Nautical outfits | |
| Corps Anglais: French blokes lusting after English women | |
| Pinz nez: Not wearing underwear | |
| Virginibus pleurisque: Raindrops keep falling on Richard Branson's charabanc | 29 Jan 1990 |
| Et in arcadia ego: I had an omelette down the shopping precinct | 29 Jan 1990 |
| Nouveau Beaujolais: Unsuitable for drinking | 29 Jan 1990 |
| Dos vidanya: I'm sleeping rough with Anya | 29 Jan 1990 |
| Porca verba: Pig Latin | 29 Jan 1990 |
| Aqua minerali: Waiter, I'm driving | 29 Jan 1990 |
| Sole bonne femme: I met this great lady at the Olympics | 29 Jan 1990 |
| Mama mia!: Rosemary's baby | 29 Jan 1990 |
| La vie en rose: I've got a pink khasi | 29 Jan 1990 |
| Canard a l'orange: Iain Paisley's lying | 29 Jan 1990 |
| Vin ordinaire: Ford Transit | 29 Jan 1990 |
| La belle dame sans merci: The telephone operator never says 'thank you' | 29 Jan 1990 |
